Walls. We all have them. They are what stop us from achieving, from being free, and from living the life we know we deserve. Thomas had them. He was a key account manager at a fast-growing business. He was new at his job and did it well except for one small area: he couldn't phone potential clients.
Acquiring new accounts was a small, but important part of his work. It was expected that key account managers network to help the company continue its impressive growth. When it came time to call potential clients, Thomas would dial five or six numbers and then slam down the phone, check his emails, clean his desk, or play a quick game of cards on his computer. He wasn't afraid of talking on the phone or of meeting new people. What was stopping him?
Thomas had a Fear-of-Failure Wall. He was good at his job because his job was easy for him. He did enough to do it well, but not outstandingly. When it came to new clients, he knew he would have to give it his all to get their business. That was something he couldn't do. If he gave 80 per cent and failed, then he wouldn't feel like a failure because he knew he didn't try his best. In his eyes he never failed, but at the same time he never truly succeeded. He never went as far as he could have because he was always protecting himself from failure. Walls often protect us while preventing us from reaching our full potential. We have become so used to these walls around us that we can't imagine our life without them. We first give up on our dreams, then on ourselves, and eventually on what we are capable of achieving in life.
Thomas was able to tear down his walls. He had received help from a coworker who had torn down a Control-Freak Wall. She showed him a six-step method of introspection, realization, and perseverance.
It starts with Desire. Our ability to change only goes as deep as our desire for change. If your Desire is small, so will the change that follows. If your Desire runs deep, then there will be no limits to your possibilities.
Lasting change starts here. For Thomas, it started around his seventh or eighth game of solitaire one afternoon when he realized he wanted more.
Find your Direction. If you are not changing, if you are not tearing down your walls, then what are you doing? Where are you going? Do your daily actions contribute to your wall or to your freedom? Look deeply at each action (or inaction) in your life. Even the smallest moment can be indicative of something greater. For Thomas, it was the different ways he held himself back. It was not only checking e-mails, but the nine cups of coffee he drank each day. He could have been more productive. He could have tried harder. He constantly found ways to slow himself down.
Make the Decision to change. You have the Desire. You know the Direction you need to follow. Now make the Decision. Tear down your walls. There is no perfect time. You've thought and talked about it so often, now make the Decision to really do it. Once you do, you begin to change as your actions have purpose and integrity. It can happen in an instant. Thomas made his Decision when he closed his Internet browser and opened his contact folder.
Stand in Defiance of old patterns. People often change and then change back.
Our walls are old and strong. We built them to protect ourselves. When we tear them down, many of our old fears and negative beliefs come rushing back. We need to first accept that we have these negative emotions and urges, and then withstand them. Do not give in. Remember: life is what you make it. As Thomas dialed the number of his first client, he was afraid. He wanted to put down the phone, but he realized that settling for modest success was far worse than trying his best and failing.
Determination every day. Like the swing of a sledge hammer, it is all meaningless unless we follow through. Determination is our follow through.
We have started a process that will not stop once our walls are gone. We will not stop changing. We are always trying to better ourselves. Thomas' wall did not fall down with one phone call. Or the next. Or the one after that. It fell when he came into work every day and gave it his all no matter the outcome.
Welcome your Deliverance. The wall is down. You are free. Be free to be the person you truly are. Tap into your potential and unlock all your unique gifts. See what you can offer the world and what the world can offer you.
Welcome this new part of you, and be proud of what you have accomplished. Feel the joy of being free. Thomas could experience for the first time real success because he was no longer afraid of failure. Not only did he become better at his job, but all other aspects of his life improved.
Desire, Direction, Decision, Defiance, Determination, and Deliverance. These are the steps to tearing down your walls and living your life with happiness, balance, and success. Afterwards, you will act in a more natural and purposeful way. There is nothing you can't do. There is nothing to stop you. So start. Find the Desire and begin to live the life you know you were meant to.
About the Author:
Adele Landauer witnessed the fall of the Berlin Wall first hand. Inspired by this tremendous event, she has gone on to show others how they can tear down the walls in their lives with her keynote address: "Tear Down Your Walls and Feel Free to Achieve". As a coach, Adele's client list includes BMW, Bayer AG, VW, Axel Springer, and Microsoft. Her first international book is entitled, "Experience Total Freedom: 6 Steps to Tearing Down Your Walls and Living Your Life with Happiness, Balance, and Success. Inspired by the Fall of the Berlin Wall".